Consider and answer me, O LORD my God

Psalm 13

Prayer for Help in Trouble.

For the choir director. A Psalm of David.

    ¹How long, O LORD? Will You forget me forever?
         How long will You hide Your face from me?
    ²How long shall I take counsel in my soul,
         Having sorrow in my heart all the day?
         How long will my enemy be exalted over me?
    ³Consider and answer me, O LORD my God;
         Enlighten my eyes, or I will sleep the sleep of death,
    ⁴And my enemy will say, "I have overcome him,"
         And my adversaries will rejoice when I am shaken.
    ⁵But I have trusted in Your lovingkindness;
         My heart shall rejoice in Your salvation.
    ⁶I will sing to the LORD,
         Because He has dealt bountifully with me.


When you feel discouraged. When you feel alone. Don't worry, you're not the only one who has felt this way. You're not the only one whose heart has cried out, "where is so great a salvation?"


I think the verse that strikes me to the core is "How long shall I take council in my own soul?" Have you ever felt this way? How many times do we simply lock ourselves away to think, to plot out courses to find our solutions, our own happiness? I do this, I receive my own council readily, I weigh in the balance every option and never find peace in any conclusion.


The Lord is drawing us towards that which is simple, that which is eternal, and that which satisfies; his person. 


When you find yourself in these times, cling to what the psalmist discovers, cling to his heart cry. He shouts as we all do whether we realize it or not, "consider my heart cry!" or rather "Lord please don't forget me!" No dear ones, you are not forgotten, he will enlighten your eyes.


"But i have trusted in your loving-kindness" here is our part, trust. Faith is built on trust, not in ideas, but in a person. The cry is to "My Lord, My God." The temptation is to believe he is not ours, that we are apart from him. Don't forget the words of Christ, his prayer to the father. That we might know we are in Him and he in the father and the father and he in us. Here is the salvation in which we rejoice. We are not separate, we need not seek our own council continually, we only need trust in Him. 


So open your mouth and praise him. In times of loneliness and confusion confess out loud those simple truths you do know, those realities that supersede all emotion. He is our God, and he has delt bountifully with us. 

I have a message from God in my heart...

Psalm 36^[a]

    For the director of music. Of David the servant of the LORD.

 ¹ I have a message from God in my heart
   concerning the sinfulness of the wicked:^[b]
There is no fear of God
   before their eyes.

 ² In their own eyes they flatter themselves
   too much to detect or hate their sin.
³ The words of their mouths are wicked and deceitful;
   they fail to act wisely or do good.
⁴ Even on their beds they plot evil;
   they commit themselves to a sinful course
   and do not reject what is wrong.

 ⁵ Your love, LORD, reaches to the heavens,
   your faithfulness to the skies.
⁶ Your righteousness is like the highest mountains,
   your justice like the great deep.
   You, LORD, preserve both people and animals.
⁷ How priceless is your unfailing love, O God!
   People take refuge in the shadow of your wings.
⁸ They feast on the abundance of your house;
   you give them drink from your river of delights.
⁹ For with you is the fountain of life;
   in your light we see light.

 ¹⁰ Continue your love to those who know you,
   your righteousness to the upright in heart.
¹¹ May the foot of the proud not come against me,
   nor the hand of the wicked drive me away.
¹² See how the evildoers lie fallen—
   thrown down, not able to rise!

I'm too smart to do this, but here I am. What is peace my friends? I've spent a lot of time dwelling on this idea, perhaps too much. I'm a creature of habit, I like my routines. I love coffee in the morning and knowing someone loves me, and knowing someone will hurt because they care for me.

"I have a message from God in my heart." 

That still small voice. That voice which reminds me of my need in the depth of my rationalizations, my explanations, my willful desire to be free of accountability. I'm not here to judge, I'm not here to say stop sinning. What use is that?


I long for peace. to close my eyes at night and rest...


"there is no fear of God before their eyes." Those stupid sinners, if they would just get right with Jesus this world would be a better place. Wouldn't that be wonderful? Dumb, that's quite simply a dumb thing to say, because I'm a believer, I'm right with Jesus and I still have a lot of "right" to be doing.


I think its right to say I flatter myself too much. I can think myself out of any hole, lie my way into any explanation, but I can't hide from the light. I can't hide from the light that sees light. 


So great a salvation, we neglect so great a salvation. I've neglected it, and if you're honest with yourself you have to. No I'm not judging you, this is not a call to righteousness. I'm not the holy spirit.


This is a call away from self delusion. I'm guilty of it, why should I say otherwise? I own my behavior, no one else does. Nobody forces any of my actions.


I have been told to do a thing and it hurts, it hurts because it's familiar as all old friends are. I know every thought and every way of the beast. I can explain  its actions, I can see where it goes, I know in my heart it's motivation, but I posses no justification. 


Perhaps, I think myself to complicated, to exceptional. I can change it! I'm a believer I can redeem this! I can show forgiveness! In me a light will be seen!
What a fool's errand.


Yes I'm a fool. I'm a fool for listening to my rationalizations rather than my maker. The Lord hates. Yes, you read that. He is not all love. Shocking I know. He hates because he loves. He is not duplicitous in love as I am, no he is singular in motivation. His love is everlasting and sees past temporal logic. 


My friends, you find yourself confused, you find yourself down, you find yourself saying where is my salvation?! 


I'm laughing...I'm laughing because I am with you. I am laughing because the answer is so simple. We don't want to listen. Don't get mad at me for saying so. And don't look for some deeper meaning. The promises of God are yes and no. How much simpler could it be.


Love is clear, love casts out fear. Why? because it is as simple as yes and no. There is no argument, there are no grey areas between yes and no. 


"they plot an evil course on their bed" I am guilty. Why because I look to justify. I look to my explanations of simple truths, my yes is maybe, my no...perhaps. 


No the evil is not I shall kill and deceive, but.... I know.


I simply must shift. I must yes or no. If yes requires rationalization, it is no. And if no the weight of all my being and mental strength...


Peace is simple, love is simple. Such are these that no argument can come against them. His love, his love for me has no conditions, no arguments save yes I do. If he says to let go, let go. Let be, let it be. His words are simple, I should let my actions be too.